Tuesday, February 17, 2015

A Dying Place

A few weeks ago the girls and I starteCBS (Community Bible Study) and we're studying 2 Corinthians.  This post is a lot of  personal reflection of what's being taught.  I'd recommend listening to the lessons if you have some time. (here is the link. I joined in on lesson 17).  Most illustrations I make came from the teachers, Stewart and Terry, (not me).  God is so crazy to put me in this place in this time under these lessons!!!

I'm in a dying place.
It's not a place of physical death like from illness, but a place where I could die in the sense that I stop living life the way God intended for me to live.
A place of death could be...
actually death of a loved one
miscarriage 
loss of job
financial ruin
divorce
disability
illness
big move
The list could go on... 
We all know of people who are facing dying places or you may currently be in one yourself. I've been to almost all of the listed places in my own life where I could've died.  But instead of dying, God resurrected me from each place of death.  Each place seemed like it could bury me permanently, but instead it grew me.  They were all very dark times that I wouldn't want to go back to, yet walking through the process of each changed me.  I wish I could've bypassed those struggles, but each taught me a dimension of God and molded me into who I am today. I'd like to say one dying place changed me and I'm "good," but I guess that's what encourages and scares me the most... I'm not.  I'm a work in progress, constantly being changed and molded.  Either I'm not content to stay where I am and desire growth or I'm that big of a mess that it takes REALLY BIG stuff to polish me?  The truth is probably somewhere in the middle :)
My biggest problem is not in the recognizing the dying place, but wanting to be "fixed" instantly.  I want to acknowledge and move on, but each place contains "a process".  There's a process I must go through.  I know I'll get through, but I need to...
"trust the process" (great phrase from Stewart in Lesson 17... you really should go listen :).
Death isn't a wall, but a doorway.
The Lord wants us to be transformed, but if we quit in the middle we (and those in our lives) will miss out on all that God has for us.  

DEATH + RESURRECTION = TRANSFORMATION

I must allow God to resurrect what is dead in me and transform me into something new, but I have to be willing to..
open my eyes again to what He's doing around me
allow Him to interrupt my plans
maybe give us something "good" for something "better"
use my gifts remembering it takes faith to walk through open doors
and be prepared for opposition

I'm still struggling in my new place, but the threat of actually dying and being worthless reminds me to keep moving forward.  These lessons didn't instantly fix me, but my perspective has shifted enough for me to come up and take a breath of fresh air.  This "dying place" doesn't have an easy fix, so...

  • I will trust the process of this moment in my life
  • I won't quit because He's doing something beautiful in my life
  • When I walk out of this dark place, I will be transformed once again and willing to walk through some open doors. 
  • I have an open door before me right now that scares me (more on that later), but I will remember that "He who began a good work in me will be faithful to complete it"... not me, by myself, on my own power
  • I will know He has gone before me to prepare a way.  There have been and continue to be so many blessings... simple reminders of His provision and presence.
I am in a place of death, but there must be death before true life...



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